"Twisted Snacks"

Well, it’s Memorial Day, and most Americans are munching down ridiculous quantities of hotdogs. This over-practiced part of American Culture begs the question, why in the world is a meat product made from various left over scraps of beef and/or pork called a hotdog? How can we shamelessly eat something named after “man’s best friend”, who’s probably sitting at our feet while we eat it, waiting to be thrown the last piece of “hotDOG”? We are sick enough to feed a hotdog to a hot dog! It’s not made of canine meat (at least I hope it’s not), so why call it that? And yet we go through this ritual every “picnic holiday”, not noticing the disgusting undertones.

I was looking at a box of animal crackers the other day, and I noticed something odd for the first time:
You're eating cookies that are shaped like animals. Not shaped like meat, but the actual animals. That's weird. And to make it even weirder and more sadistic, the box is filled with drawings of realistic looking animals of the ones you're about to eat shapes of. And they look quite happy, possibly not realizing their impending fate…
This is very dark, twisted, sadistic, and morbid when you really think about it. Who came up with such a thing?

How about Goldfish crackers? "The snack that smiles back", how twisted is that!
They even go to the length of carving little smiles on each cracker, so they can smile all the way to their death in your digestive system!
And now they even have a bio on the back of the package for one of the fish you're about to devour! So now you even know his/her name as you take him out of existence. Twisted I tell you! Twisted!

Anyway everybody, have a nice Memorial Day, and be safe.

©2010 Denim McDemus